“Don’t like me so much”, he said as he let go a puff of smoke from the cigarette between his lips.She observed his expressions. Did he really mean it? Or was he teasing her?
She wasn’t still sure how deep their relationship was.
Was it lust, love or both? She always wondered. Whatever it was, she knew she was addicted to it. As the thoughts were raging in her mind, her body was getting cozy in his arms. She wanted to be there forever. The smell of smoke, lined with a trace of her favourite deo and aftershave on him, was intoxicating as well as satisfying.
Some relations cant be named. This was one of them. She believed in rebirth, reincarnation, past lives, tarot readings, and all those intangible esoteric things.
More than present reality, she loved to be in her dream world.
Her imagination would run wild, from deserts to oceans, snowy mountains to lavish palaces, backyard to terraces, beach houses to temple ruins. She thought about being with him everywhere. Her deepest fantasies, her wildest dreams, all belonged to him.
This weekend was real. One of her fantasies had come true.
Spending two whole nights with him, undisturbed, had been magical.
She wondered if they would have shared the same passion, had they been married.
Sometimes, things happen for reasons that become obvious later. This may be one of those, them not getting married that is.
He was caressing her back, which she loved. She was enjoying the warmth, the mush, the sensual experience. It was worth the lies, the guilt and other not very comfortable feelings. After all, everything is fair in love n war. This was love..indeed.
I love you, she said, as she kissed his cheek. He smiled and said, me too.
She checked the time, her flight would leave in about two hours. However difficult, but she must leave now.
Her throat became heavy, tears were about to roll down, but she smiled. Like she always did, when that moment came. The thought of separation pierced her heart like a sharp spear. The wound would take a while to heal, but she liked the afterburn which the passionate encounter left on her heart. Like the sensation his stubble left on her skin, when their faces brushed while kissing. Time was up..she had to go. They hugged for the last time before saying bye. Their eyes met, the cab was waiting down. He helped her get dressed. With heavy feet and a heavier heart, she traced back her steps to the door. Not knowing whether to knock again, to look back again, she left his building.
As the cab left, she said “I lovehim”. She was sure.